Confident, not Arrogant

Arrogance requires confidence, but
confidence doesn't require arrogance.

Last week I sent an email that ignited a firestorm of discussion when the recipient decided to share it with others.

It was a simple two- or three-sentence email that asked, what I believed, was a appropriate question regarding a task I was expected to perform. I don't think the recipient was ready for the question and didn't have an answer. That was the fuel for the flame.

My very opinionated comments that ended the short email was obviously what fanned the flames.

What's annoying to me is the conversations that have swirled among those who know about the email.  Mostly attacks on my character, calling me "ballsy" and "arrogant."

Seriously? That got me thinking: What does that mean?

ballsy: balls·y (bôl z ). adj. balls·i·er, balls·i·est Vulgar Slang. Very tough and courageous, often recklessly or presumptuously so.

arrogant:  adj. Having or displaying a sense of overbearing self-worth or self-importance. Marked by or arising from a feeling or assumption of one's superiority toward others: an arrogant contempt for the weak.

Hmmm.  I may be a little ballsy at times.  I'd like to think that I'm tough and courageous, but I try to never been reckless or presumptuous. I certainly hope that I don't have a sense of overbearing self-importance.

As I said, the email recipient wasn't prepared to answer my question and that angered him.  If I posted his name, many of you would think "pot calling the kettle black."

I prefer to think of myself as confident and self-assured.

confident: con·fi·dent  (knf-dnt). adj. Marked by assurance, as of success. Marked by confidence in oneself; self-assured.

self-as·sured: (slf-shrd) adj. Having or showing confidence and poise.

Confidence vs arrogance both involve believing in one’s abilities.

A person who is confident understands they have certain areas of strength. A person who is arrogant also believes that have certain areas of strength.

A person with confidence will also understand others maybe stronger, and that each person is a complete package of strengths and weaknesses so will remain humble in both. An arrogant person will often neglect to acknowledge weakness in light of playing up the strengths.

I'm very confident I'm not arrogant.

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