Smoke and mirrors is a metaphor for a deceptive, fraudulent or insubstantial explanation or description. The source of the name is based on magicians' illusions, where magicians make objects appear or disappear by extending or retracting mirrors amid a distracting burst of smoke. The expression may have a connotation of virtuosity or cleverness in carrying out such a deception.
After a recent trip to Grand Rapids, I decided I need to drive a different vehicle. The 15 MPG on the highway is what got me thinking. Looking back over my credit card statements at the fuel purchases is what convinced me.
My goal is to find a decent vehicle with better-than-I'm-getting gas mileage. That would be just about anything.
A few things a no-brainers: a car over a truck for not only the better mileage, but also the ability to haul other passengers; most likely a Ford since my dad has pretty much driven a Ford or Mercury all my life and I have had equal success with the make as well; used instead of new because I want to keep the payments lower.
My nephew Matthew picked up a Ford Fusion not too long ago. I haven't heard complaints and he says the savings on fuel lover his F250 4x4 Extended Cab Diesel basically pays for the car.
And you don't have to listen to that rumbling diesel engine either.
Early this week I was out for a Sunday drive and stopped by an auto dealership to check out a 2011 Ford Fusion they had listed on their website.
It looked like a decent car, and I was interested, but the price was a bit higher than I was ready to pay. I'm being a miser about spending my money and adding debt to my life. By Thursday I decided I should take a test drive.
I wasn't surprised when I quickly caught the eye of one vulture (aka sales weasel) circling the lot. They're very keen at spotting prey and hope for a one that is old and dumb and won't put up my resistance when they come in for the kill.
After the test drive, I told the sales weasel if he could come down $1500 on the asking price, it would pretty much be a done deal. After the words left my mouth I realized how stupid that was, but we'd see where it would go.
Then the song and dance followed by a "Have I got a deal for you" smoke and mirrors routine started with the weasel giving me a breakdown of how much my payments would be for 60, 72 and 77 months. Are you kidding? Finance a car for 77 months? That's nearly six-and-a-half years.
There's no discount in the amount you're suggesting I finance. Of course not, young sales weasel had to run that offer past the grand sales weasel for counter offer only after showing prey how reasonable the monthly payment will be.
After too much of the smoke and mirrors show with young weasel leaving his desk to confer with grand weasel (who I don't think existed, young weasel was following his predetermined weasel manual), I told young weasel I'll think about it.
As I write this, at just past four in the morning, I'm frustrated that I'm not buying a car because the dealer won't come down another $180; and I'm irritated that the last conversation included all the fees and other charges including the "$24 State of Michigan CVR Fee" and "$190 Doc(ument) Fee."
Total smoke and mirrors! The Computer Vehicle Registration is a convenience to the dealer so they don't need to stand in line at the DMV and fee is allowed -- BUT NOT CHARGED -- by the State of Michigan; while the doc fee is just the dealership's way of saying, "We're charging you this hidden fee to process the paperwork to make money off a car we're selling you.
If the car wasn't such a damn good deal, I think I'd still be asleep right now.
Check out all the blog entries at BareNakedBill.blogspot.com
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