Tuesday Tally: Bill's List of Life's Lessons

 "Experience is a hard teacher:
she gives the test first, and the lesson afterwards."
—Vernon Law, former major league baseball player

As I've grown older, I hope that I have grown wiser.  I try to pass on bits of wisdom I have gained along the journey I call life.

So in keeping with my Tuesday Tally, here are a few of the lessons I try to keep remember everyday.

• All things are as they should be.  Sometimes we get caught up in thinking that our lives should be different. We think we need more than we have or otherwise feel we're lacking something. We try to predict the actions (or reactions) of others. It all just causes stress on our own life. Sometimes when it seems like everyone is falling apart, they're actually falling into place.
• You can't fix others, only yourself. I'm a nurturer. I take care of others.  My jobs -- customers services and EMS is all about caring for others, making people happy or healthy. But it's not always possible to fix someone else's problem. But you can fix yourself by making changes that make you a better person. We may fall back into the old habits, but that's not a failure.  Failure is not continuing the work on those changes.
• Risking emotional hurt is worth it. There is nothing more painful that the emotional hurt. Regardless of the cause -- a failed relationship, an unexpected reaction from someone, betrayal or public humiliation -- it's still painful. Most emotional hurt comes from our interaction with others, so avoiding the hurt means avoiding others.  Life would be far too mundane withing interpersonal relationship.
• True freedom comes from not caring what others think of you. When you're concerned about what others think of you, you are somehow owned by them. That's not to say you can act like a total butthead. But when you no longer concern yourself with the confines of public opinion, you are free.  March to the beat of your own drum.
• Carpe diem! I hate that phrase, which is Latin for "Seize the day."  Just fricking seize the day already.  No matter the language, it still gets you started in the right direction.  Failure to seize the day (or the opportunity) only leads to one thing: REGRET.
• Choose your battles carefully. A fight for the sake of fighting never has a victory. Sometimes it's just easier to walk away from the battle. Sometimes it's necessary to fight the battle.  Knowing the correct choice is important.
• Being single can be the best thing for you.  I know so many men (and a few women) who have never lived alone.  They go from their parent's home into a home with a roommate/live-in/spouse.  Living alone gives you the opportunity to find the confidence to stand alone and take care of yourself. That's not to say having someone at your side isn't awesome, but so many people are totally lost when they are suddenly alone.
• Asking for (professional) help doesn't mean you're weak. I'm a big supporter of counseling. Talking to someone impartial (which excludes anyone who knows you) can open doors into your mind. I am a prime example. Through counseling, I gained the ability to work through even the most difficult problems I face.  Give it a try.
• Exercise control when life is out of control. When everything seems to be out of control, you can still control how you react to the chaos. Exercise that control empowers you to endure what comes your way.
• Some people will lie to you.  It's said, keep your fiends close and your enemies closer. It's also true that an honest enemy is better than a friend who lies.  Actions speak louder than words so pay less attention to what people say, and more attention to what they do.  Their actions will show you the truth.
• Everything is going to be alright. No matter what is happening, eventually it will be okay. Like Lil' Orphan Annie sings, "The Sun will come out Tomorrow."  So enjoy the thunderstorm knowing things will be brighter another time.

 In the end, it's about living life fully. Seize it!

More wit and wisdom at BareNakedBill.blogspot.com